Beacher's Madhouse: A Circus For Celebrities

Sandra Bullock and Heidi Klum recently had their first friend-date at Beacher’s Madhouse inside the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel.

According to sources, the two danced the night away, sang along to some songs and were overall “just having fun by themselves.”

The Roosevelt Hotel is infamous for its celebrity clientele and rich Hollywood history. Locals just find it a great place to stop in for a cocktail. But Beacher’s Madhouse is a whole different thing. Midgets, strip shows, giant bunny rabbits…it’s, well, it’s a madhouse, I tell you! So here’s a little rundown of what the hell this thing is.

Visitors to the show enter through a secret passageway. Yes, a secret passageway. It’s hidden in a library bookcase. From there, you walk down a long hallway into a traditional Vaudeville theater, where you’ll see the most bizarre, entertaining show ever. There are twenty banquettes that seat over a hundred patrons. There’s a custom birdcage banquette for VIPs. Oh, and if you’re trying to dodge the pap, there’s a private underground garage, too.

Once you’re in, it gets weird and wonderful. There are two full bars and a mini-sized Midget Bar with a Midget Mixologist. There are also flying midget bartenders. Yes, it seems a little completely exploitative, but hey, as long as everyone’s having a good time.

And then there are the acts. The venue’s website lists them: “The Madhouse Dancing Oompa Loompas, sultry singers, Tiny Kiss, live monkeys and goats, Mini Lady Gaga, beautiful and exotic burlesque dancers, live bands and DJs, the Madhouse Mascots such as Giant Bunny Rabbits and Pink Gorillas, Mini Britney Spears, thousands of variety acts.”

On the show’s audition page, it reveals they’re looking for hypnotists, fat people, stilt walkers, drag queens and elephants. So yeah, there’s a lot going on there.

And if you think you can just drop in, you’ve got another thing coming. Beacher’s Madhouse is working on its exclusivity, which explains the slew of celebs. As of September 2011, a membership will be required to visit the venue. Not only are memberships pricey, you might not even get one. They’ll only be handing out 2,000.

Jeff Beacher is the brain behind the show, having started it off in Las Vegas’ Hard Rock Hotel. David Arquette used to MC/host the event, but he recently parted ways with Beacher. Arquette made the announcement in June, Tweeting:

“I will no longer be a part of Beacher’s Madhouse. Effective immediately. I will be opening my own establishment shortly. Thank you.”

Will there be flying midgets? Live monkeys? Naked women? We’ll see.